Month: November 2018

Doing Nothing Well

On By Betty OwensIn Betty Thomason Owens

I’m really good at nothing. Hello, Thursday Morning friends! I’m so glad you’re here. I’m thinking again. Uh-oh. Right?

You know when someone asks you, “What are you thinking about?” and you say, “Oh, nothing”?

Is it even possible to think of nothing? Or to be thinking of…nothing?

You might think I’m being negative when I say I’m good at nothing, but you’re wrong. I am really good at (doing) nothing. In fact, I excel at it. If not for ole guilt, I’d spend a lot more time doing nothing. Thinking of…nothing.

But guilt keeps me going. Doing everything but nothing. The problem is, I tend to take on too much. You know the feeling? It’s a problem for many of us, especially this time of year. If you’re a mom, it’s magnified. Everything has to be perfect. You want your life to be a Hallmark movie. Or at least a little bit like one.

The Hallmark movies are like reading the condensed version of a novel. You see only the high points and low points and they wrap up quickly into forever love. All the extra stuff that goes on gets cut out. Life is not that predictable.

Yes, there are moments when you get to relax and breathe and enjoy relaxing and breathing. But those moments are B-O-R-I-N-G to everyone except self. Personally, I love those moments of nothing. Maybe because I know they are only scattered here and there throughout my busy, busy days.

But I’ve noticed something very important. If you’re too busy, if you say yes too many times, you may become overwhelmed. And then you’re really good at the negative nothing. You don’t have the time or the patience to be really good at anything. Or, if you do manage to accomplish all those things on your list and/or calendar, you’re probably going to be too tired to enjoy your accomplishments.

Then you’re going to DREAD the holidays because they represent negative things like failure and disappointment.

My advice to you, right now, before it’s too late, is to take a breath. Pause between the question and the answer. “Can you volunteer to do the decorations for the dinner?” “Will you head the committee to spearhead donations for that?” “Oh, and by the way can you also (insert task here)?? You’re just so good at that!”

Take a breath. Pause. Think it through. What will you remove from your list to make room for whatever you’re being asked to do? Maybe the more important question is, what’s your immediate gut reaction to the request? Is it a cringe? Go with that. Don’t wimp out. Say the word. “NO.”

Yes, the holidays come once a year. With good advance planning, you will survive them. If you haven’t made a plan, it’s not too late. Almost, but there’s still time.

Make a list right now, of THE most important things you need to do in order to have the kind of Christmas you really want for your family. Now, include your church family, or those outside your family with whom you are connected.

Next, go back over the list and prioritize the most important things. Keep the little ones in mind (if you have them). What will make their Christmas memorable? Hint: it’s not things. It’s probably time with you. Time, and a smile on your face.

I’m not slapping hands here. I’m reminding myself. My calendar is full and I have regular work and tasks to deal with on top of those. I’m dealing with a sense of dread. It’s too tempting to curl up on the couch with a hot beverage, a blankey, and a holiday movie. I have to remind myself that’s okay once in a while, but not all the time.

Well, coffee’s ready. I’m going to spend a few moments sipping, breathing, and contemplating nothing.

My calendar is full today. And tomorrow. And the next day. But, I’m keeping my eye on the prize of a stellar Christmas celebration.

Have a splendiferous weekend. May you find time to breathe and kick back, if only for a moment.

Help and give without expecting a return. You’ll never—I promise—regret it. Live out this God-created identity the way our Father lives toward us, generously and graciously, even when we’re at our worst. Our Father is kind; you be kind.–Luke 6:35-36 MSG

The Thanksgiving Chicken Memory

On By Betty OwensIn Betty Thomason Owens

chicken, hen, domineckerThanksgiving at Grandma’s house did not include turkey, or if it did, the turkey was quite small and looked like chicken.

Hello, Thursday Morning readers! Thanksgiving is one week from today. So, I’m feeling a little nostalgic. Just a couple of weeks ago, I stood at Aunt Edna’s grave side. My mind filled with memories as I glanced around at the nearest markers. Uncle Bud, Granny, Grandma…they’re all together now.

We had some wonderful memories at Grandma’s table, small as it was. The family showed up, all the aunts “totin'” a dish or two, as Grandma would say. We’d set the table and leave a stack of plates on the Hoosier cabinet for the kids to fill and take to the living room.

The star of Grandma’s dinner table was a chicken. Grandma raised chickens, so one was always handy.

Okay, I have a confession to make here: I never ate chicken at Grandma’s. Maybe I was a picky eater—I don’t remember—but that hunk of flesh in the center of the table had been out in the yard a few hours ago, scratching around. I couldn’t eat it.

I loved all the vegetables, though. Mashed potatoes and gravy, lima beans, crowder peas, skillet corn and cornbread dressing. But not the chicken, and certainly not the giblet gravy. I’d seen what went into the gravy. NO way!

This girl didn’t eat innards.

Next week, there will be a turkey on my Thanksgiving table. And, there will be giblet gravy, because my husband loves it. These days, I usually eat the turkey. I hope it had a good upbringing.

And I hope you have a wonderful holiday, whether you serve turkey or chicken, or a table-full of vegetables.

For each new morning with its light,

For rest and shelter of the night,

For health and food,

For love and friends,

For everything Thy goodness sends,

Father in heaven,

We thank thee.

—Ralph Waldo Emerson [Prayer of Thanks]

How to Intimidate a Wall

On By Betty OwensIn Betty Thomason Owens4 Comments

Okay, I know what you’re thinking.

Hello, Thursday Morning readers! Have I gotten your attention with that first paragraph?

That was my intent.

So, what kind of wall are we talking? One made of wood and wallboard? A painted wall? A brick wall? Stone?

It’s not made with human hands. It exists only in my mind. But it may as well be steel, like a vault. It’s cold and unforgiving at times. And it seems to have no beginning, and no end.

Sigh.

I have to be honest with you and myself. I know what makes up this wall. It’s fear. And this fear goes by many names.

  • Inadequacy.
  • Uncertainty.
  • Lack.
  • Loneliness.
  • Failure.

Oh, that last one, though.

I stare at the thing, and this cold, unforgiving wall stares back at me.

So, I wrote down some more words.

  • Fearless.
  • Loved.
  • Successful.
  • Over-comer.
  • Winner.

Then, I taped this list to the wall and stared at it.

Did it help? Honest answer—yes. I felt hope stirring in my heart. Silly? Not at all. What you look at, what you read, what you think about, who you hang out with, where you hang out…all these things contribute to who you are.

If you concentrate on your shortcomings, that’s all you’ll see. It becomes an impenetrable wall. It may live and breathe, because it’s part of you.

If you change the words to positive ones and concentrate on them, will you eventually become them? You have a very good chance. Why? Words can give life. Words can create.

I created that wall by concentrating on the negative. Maybe tiredness took me there, maybe illness or a disappointment of some kind. I fed the words until the wall became insurmountable.

What now? When faced with such a wall, how would you react? How have you managed to overcome a thing like this? I’d love to hear your story.

I tackled it with a butter knife when I taped the list to its surface. 🙂

There’s strength in the words I came up with, more strength in the Word of God.

Research is something I enjoy, so I went to work and found a couple of bulldozers to attack that wall.

I am God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works which God prepared in advance for (me) to do. [Ephesians 2:10]

Okay. That one stirred my heart and gave me courage. If God has plans for me and the work I do, surely He plans to finish this work.

According to Ephesians 1:14, I am chosen. Predestined. “God’s possession–to the praise of His glory.”

I’m getting closer now. This one does more than stir. The wall doesn’t seem so intimidating now.

And finally, Joel 2:7-9 —

They charge like warriors;
    they scale walls like soldiers.
They all march in line,
    not swerving from their course.
 They do not jostle each other;
    each marches straight ahead.
They plunge through defenses
    without breaking ranks.
They rush upon the city;
    they run along the wall.

What does this passage tell me? I’ve been trying to destroy the impenetrable wall, when I really needed to scale it! I can run on it! I don’t need to tear it down.

Yes, fear and anguish and all those ugly words may have built that wall. It’s bricks may be held together by all my past failures, but the pressure of God’s great mercy will compact all its parts. What happens when pressure is applied to coal? It becomes a diamond. Strong. Unbreakable.

I hope you can make sense of my rambling here. I hope you’ve captured the gist of my thoughts. I’m an over-comer. Jumping over the wall—running along the top of the wall—whatever it takes to accomplish the thing that God has planned in advance for me to do.

Yes, you can intimidate a wall. You just need to know the right words to say.

Lost But Found

On By Betty OwensIn Betty Thomason Owens

Hello, Thursday Morning readers! I’m so glad you’re here and it’s actually Thursday, not Wednesday (like last week). November is here, and the whirlwind of activities begin for some as we prepare for the holidays and the end of another year.

Leah Diaz

I have a very special story to share with you today from my friend Leah Diaz, missionary in Cuenca, Ecuador. I first met her when I visited Cuenca a couple of years ago. She’s managing director at Unsion Plus. Unsion is a television station in Cuenca. Her efforts there include a program called The April Project, to help those struggling with addiction.

So, this is what getting lost looks like, or is it? Let me share a story with you.

A couple of weeks ago at the construction site for our new church plant and counseling center in Jima, one of the locals walks by and asks why we were there. Among the reasons, one thing I shared is that we hope to help families struggling with addiction.

He then points to the mountains to an area that from a distance appeared to be a bunch of trees. He said “there”! You must go “there”. He shared with me that the entire community struggles with addiction in a way that he has never seen and that there is no one to help them. He then told me the name of the community.

Every day since, that name has been on my heart and in my prayers. So today on the way to Jima I got lost, really lost. It was the no GPS, no phone signal, no people around, also fun, but also scary kind of lost.

San José de Raranga, Ecuador

Well, to my sweet surprise the first sign I see just happens to have the name of that same community on it! I could NOT believe it. I somehow stumbled upon the trees of San José de Raranga!

It was not part of the plan, or was it? I just love how God leads us even when we are lost. Found. Loved. Chosen. We can completely lose our “way” and find our “why”!

 

Found. Loved. Chosen. We can completely lose our “way” and find our “why!” #travel #adventure #Ecuador [Click to Tweet]

This is just another reason WHY I am here. Today was a reminder of that. Please pray for freedom in San José de Raranga!

If the trees and mountains are this beautiful, I just can’t wait to meet the people! It’s the difficult roads that lead you to the best destinations!

Find out more about Leah Diaz, Unsion, and the April Project here:

https://www.facebook.com/Unsion.Ministries/

Leah Diaz on Facebook